Life feels as if it is ending, as if there might be nothing left. Yep. He dumped you. Or you caught him cheating and had to dump him, which was particularly awful since the girl weighed a quarter ton and had moles all over her body. Hey, however it happened, it happened. And now you’re on the broken heart diet, which consists of ice cream, cookies, the McDonald’s Dollar Menu, and whatever that hunk of moldy something was you found behind the radiator. You are metaphorically a leper in your own social life.
After a couple of days of that, you’ve just got to move on, or suffer the impending heart attack. And while getting over a broken heart may seem like an impossible task, there are certain steps that you can take to get back on the right track. Not only that, but you can also get rid of all those things you picked up during the breakup, like extra fat, acne, blotchy skin, and those pizza-sized black rings under your eyes. Just keep going back to the following steps, and, while he may not come crawling back, you’ll find yourself ready to rejoin society soon enough.
Removing the Problem
Exercise. Lying around sobbing won’t heal a broken heart. In fact, it will most likely make things worse by repelling the new people you could be meeting, making your skin break out, and, if you’ve been dosing yourself with ice cream and cookies to soothe the hurt, it can make you fat, too. Get up. Do something. Do anything. Take your dog for a walk. Learn yoga. Take a kickboxing class. Keep your body busy and in return you will help get rid of acne, get rid of fat, get rid of self-pity, get rid of depression, and release endorphins. You will look better and feel better.
Stay busy. Travel. Meet new people. Make art. Volunteer. After my broken heart, I took a trip to Iceland. I stayed with friends in Reykjavik, saw some geysers, some whales, Icelandic horses, Icelandic sheep, and met a Blues musician. And, after feeling the mist from the waterfall Gulfoss, blowing kisses to an Iceland horse, watching puffins fly, and holding the hand of a handsome Blues singer while we waded in The Blue Lagoon, I wasn’t broken hearted anymore. Maybe you can’t make it to Iceland, but try a local park, church, dance club, or wine bar. Whatever you do, just don’t stay home and cry. Do something so that you can look back and be happy for the memories. Who looks back fondly at lying around and watching TiVo for three weeks straight?
Stay pretty. There’s not much worse than crying all day long, then running into your ex when you have mascara streaming down your face, with red, blotchy skin and bloodshot eyes while you’re wearing stained sweatpants. Chances are he won’t look at you then and wish you were in his arms at night. Spend the time to make sure you look good, even if you’re just running out to pick up an extra box of tissues. That doesn’t mean you need to apply false eyelashes and wear six-inch pumps every time you go to the mailbox. But it’s nice to be clean and fresh and smell nice and having glowing skin whenever there’s a chance you might run into him, or that handsome guy down the street.
Learn something new. This keeps your mind busy and off of your ex, but it also gives you a goal to attain and quite possibly keeps you meeting new people. Take a class at a university, community college, course online, community education program, or chat up the German lady across the street and perhaps she’ll teach you some German. It doesn’t matter what you learn, just learn. You’ll feel a renewed sense of self-worth, meet new friends, and possibly meet the new love of your life. Find something you’re interested in, and the people learning the same thing must have at least one thing in common with you. Pottery class, anyone?
Surround yourself with those who love you. Mother. Brother. Sister. Friend. Simon the kitty. It doesn’t matter. Just spend time with the people that love you the most. Specifically, try to find the people that love you even when you’re sobbing, with snot and mascara running down your face. Those who love you without judging can help comfort your broken heart and keep you keepin’ on.Heal a broken heart with unconditional love
And by unconditional love, I mean a dog. As a long-time cat person, I once shuddered at the thought of the high-maintenance doggie, what with all the walking, feeding, grooming, loving, slobbery-ball throwing, etc. And then, along came Nikki: skinny, scared, cold, hungry, abandoned, cute little Nikki. Someone had so casually dumped the little mutt into the ditch and she was left alone to fend for herself. Truly, after being dumped myself, I felt we had the basis for a good friendship. And so she got me through the rough times, and I got her a lot of doggie treats. Instead of lying in bed and sobbing, I had to get up to take care of her, walk her, groom her, and feed her. I was out hitting the trails, chatting up the cute veterinary technician, learning about dog training, and generally shaking off the Skeletor look. Seven years later, Nikki has outlasted that ex by twice the time I dated him. And she has never lied to me or cheated on me, and she is the only creature on the planet, my cat included, that is happy to see me each and every time we meet again. Those are even on the days I’m not wearing makeup. Even my mom can’t claim that one. So, if your lifestyle is dog-adaptable, considering adopting or rescuing yourself a doggie. In the end, they are less work than a boyfriend, since you only have to feed, pet ,and exercise a dog, and the payback is unconditional love.
